Introduction: What are the 5 Signs Your Girlfriend Might Be the One?
I need to find out if it is okay for my girlfriend to hit me. Is it wrong for a girl who loves you to put her hands on you? It all started when I asked her what she wanted, and then the world stopped really spinning. She flipped out and slapped me, the neighbor saw and called the cops. I am so confused if a girl slaps you she loves you or is it okay if my girlfriend hit me?
–Confused (age 15)
Whoa, whoa, whoa. How old is the girl? Does she have a history of violence? Is this an isolated incident or is she prone to violent behavior? You may want to remove yourself from the situation until you can get some clear answers. You also might speak with a counselor or someone else you know and trust who can give you some objective advice.
I am not a doctor, but I can tell you that you are in a very tough spot. This article provides some further thoughts about this.
What is violence?
Sign #1 – She Loves You More Than Anything Else in Her Life
It is always a good sign if your girl loves you more than anything else in the world. However, this can be taken the wrong way sometimes. If she is ready to kill for you, it may not be a good sign that she might hit you. It is also a good thing if she is willing to do anything for you, even things she would never do on her own. In any relationship there is usually something that is more important. It might be that she was raised a certain way and feels like striking you in the face or kissing you would make her a bad person. It could also be that she has never been in a situation where she could tell you no, and sometimes it feels great when people say yes to what you want. This makes you happy. It is a good thing for you if she is willing to do anything you want, but it is not the best situation for her.
She loves you more than anything else in the world, which means she will be thinking about your happiness at all times. If she hits you or says something that hurts your feelings, it is because she wants to see how you will react. She loves you and just wants to see what you will do, knowing that it may change her life forever. She may even think that you will love her more if she can offer you something you have never been able to get anywhere else.
Sign #3 – She Has Turned Off All Her Emotions and Is Now Controlling and Calculating Outside of Your Relationship
If she is calculating how she can hurt you and how to get the most out of your relationship it could be because she is trying to protect you in some way that neither one of you has realized. It could also be that she feels like no one will love her more than what you’ve given her and she will do anything to keep you, even if it means hurting you. However, if she is very controlling and manipulating outside of the relationship and doesn’t want to share you with anyone else that is a huge sign that she is a narcissist or borderline. This type of behavior is not good for any relationship.
Sign #4 – She Has Turned on All Her Emotions and Now Is Weak, Vulnerable, and Needy for Attention ← This is where you should pull back! ← This will tear your relationship apart if you continue.
If she is so weak and vulnerable that she needs you to hold her, protect her, and make her feel safe this usually means that there is something wrong with the relationship. If you feel like she needs your help it is best to ignore this sign since it usually means that she feels alone in a world where everyone else makes her look bad. There is a fine line between helping your girl out and rescuing her, do not cross this line. When you do, the relationship dies.
What is the problem with this sign?
There are multiple problems with this sign, one of them being that it makes her look weak and vulnerable. If she looks weak and vulnerable then others will feel free to belittle her since everyone else is clearly doing a better job than she is of taking care of herself. Now her self-esteem is shot and you are left to pick up the pieces. This is bad.
What can you do to fix it?